Gravity Collapse » marketing

Walmart visit sparks existential crisis

gravitycollapse — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 07:56:07 +0000

I was going on with a normal day, getting work done, listening to music, and now, here I am drowning my sorrows in beer and questioning the significance of my existence.

I visited a site that I never visit today: Walmart. This screen capture is a portion of the site’s header.

But it was this bit that caused me to trip and fall into the endless pit of despair:

Hey, wait a minute, Walmart! I am not null. No no, I am not! I am much more than that! And furthermore, now I’m confused: should I click “not null”, or should I “Log out”?

Agh…what to do, what to do…

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Post tags: internet, marketing

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Puzzling marketing: McDonald’s China 24-hour delivery

gravitycollapse — Thu, 07 May 2009 01:36:14 +0000

McDonald’s China has fairly recently launched 24-hour delivery service in Beijing, to most parts of the city. That’s good news for those of us who need a dose of heart disease at 2:00 AM.

Here’s a portion of the flyer they’ve been stuffing under people’s apartment doors to advertise the service:

My question is: what, exactly, is going on this image?
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Read the rest of Puzzling marketing: McDonald’s China 24-hour delivery (166 words)

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Suave como el amor de Mamá

gravitycollapse — Sat, 04 Mar 2006 02:32:09 +0000

I have to confess, sometimes I can spend an embarassingly long time doing the stupidest things. For instance, the other day, I was standing in a drug store near my apartment, and I was agonizing over a very difficult choice: what kind of dryer sheets to buy. Ten minutes into this adventure, after having examined my choices up and down, resolution still seemed so far away.

I was beginning to get desperate, and a little paranoid about the people around me. That woman behind the counter…sure, she seems to be concentrating on her phone call. But what are they talking about? I can make out some Spanish, though I don’t really speak it, but could she be talking about me? “You won’t believe this guy here in the store right now. He seemed cool enough when he came in; he smiled and said hi, but he’s been standing in front of the laundry detergent and dryer sheets for a long time now. I’m starting to get worried. Maybe he’s just stalling until his friends get here and they’re going rob us. Maybe he has some kind of sexual fetish for the bear on the Snuggle fabric softener bottle. He’s so weird.”

Clearly, I needed to find a solution before she hung up and called 911.

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Read the rest of Suave como el amor de Mamá (1,389 words)

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